OKAY TO WITHDRAW
The death of a child changes us. An extrovert suddenly becomes an introvert. An introvert becomes extroverted.
I was an extrovert at the death of my daughter. Strong willed, determined, decisive, outgoing, community involved, proud of my own abilities.
I am a witness that the death of a child changes who you are forever.
Heavily involved with the local hockey association – First woman President of the Association, I struggled to go to the games my son played in. I forced myself to perform my Presidential duties but declined to serve another term.
To make a decision about anything was huge.
My confidence was shaken and I didn’t want to make a mistake so I avoided..withdrew….
Emotions were raw and I didn’t have energy left to deal with life beyond my own pain.
Broken hearted means broken in soul and spirit – I was unable to comprehend moving forward without her in my life – a contrast from living with a head strong teenager who I wondered if I could tolerate one more minute at times.
Staying sane becomes an act of will. It becomes a desire to create a positive from a negative. I had to look beyond my own pain to making her life and death have meaning. I wanted her life and death to matter – to make a difference.
Thus began the work on the inner self…Who – What – would you like to become to honour the memory of your child. Think about that !!
Change your focus . Focus on meeting again and all you’ve got to share because your child lived and died. You’re still here – your job isn’t finished yet.